writings on writing

- First off, let me say that I know I am not a great writer. I know I haven't published anything; I know that I will never have a great cult of readers who hang upon my every word and discuss which of my books are canon. I'm well aware.

However, I know there are writers which do have some or all of these things that I am not worthy to judge, but I am going to anyway.

What bothers me most is the way humor is treated. If your book is going to be funny, please, PLEASE move past the tired cliches of a saturday morning cartoon. You know, the kind that makes 8-year olds go, "Haha! He's so cool!"

No more comment. If you don't know what I'm talking about, it's probably because it's all in my head.

- By the way, Nickelback won a bunch of awards lately. I know who Nickelback is because they have about 3 songs that play every time I do an overnight. Anyway, their one song, I think it's called "If Today Was Your Last Day," ticks me off. I think I might have mentioned this in a note on Facebook, but for those of you who find that forum too "girly" (which makes no sense, honestly... hmm, that can be point 3), here it is again. The first line of the song is "My best friend gave me the best advice."

See? Professional lyricists using the same word twice in a single sentence, and not in a cool compare/contrast way. He just didn't want to have to work! The song isn't horrible, by Nickelback standards, but I can't get past the insanity that is the first line. It's not like he made up the song on the spot, in which case it's understandable. But he wrote, and rewrote, and then edited, and then had managers look at it, and production guys, etc. He WANTED to use the same word twice in the first sentence. If you hear it, you'll know what I mean about not intending the word to be some kind of link between the two phrases. He acts like "best friend" makes "best" unlike the "best" in "best advice."

I brought this up at work and the crew call me a snob. It's true, but Chad Kroeger gets paid a lot of money. The least he can do is some oratorical variance.

- Facebook. I've heard some say that "it's for girls." 2 possibilities. The people saying this truly believe that the facebook website is actually feminine, that staying in touch with people is for women only, that sending notes one facebook is like applying lipstick.... OR they don't know much about it, are too lazy to get their own account, and rather than learn/try/take time out of their day to do it, they make up an argument that has no meaning or validity.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go take a quiz about what kind of handbag accessory I couldn't live without...